Learn from others to learn about yourself



I’ve heard it said that experience is a great teacher. Well, I say that the experiences of other people are even better. My grandfather constantly said learn from others and save years of mistakes.

Think about it. If you saw your friend being chased by a dog, you’d learn to stay away from that particular dog, wouldn’t you?

Hi, I’m Mark, and I have and continue to learn much from others either by observing, asking questions, working with all types of people.

I appreciate the privilege of having time time to learn from watching people, talking about how a specific challenge was conquered or the steps taken to achieve a goal.. I don’t just mean sitting at a coffee shop watching the world go by. I mean really paying attention. Obviously tact and respect should be

I take a keen interest in what people do, how they do it, and their outcomes.

Why? Because I’ve discovered that’s how I learn not just about the world, but about myself.

I learn through the stories of mentor’s successes and failures. Not only does it help my thought process, it helps me better relate to others at a real level.

That’s right, by watching, analyzing, and taking a genuine interest in other people, I’ve learned how to relate in situations people sense sincere, genuine actions quite often and will often excitably share, offer experiences or even reveal a proud, challenge that had been achieved and written down step by step, all three years of sweat and tears that you are now able to potentially use one day without the three years of pain and suffering .

Research shows that inquiry-based teaching in the classroom isn’t just about finding the right answers, but also developing inquiring minds. By watching others, I have definitely developed a curious mind that never wants to stop learning and improving.

Today, I thought I’d let you in on the things I have learnt by being truly interested in other people.

My 8 Lessons from Watching Others
  1. write out a plan 10 years and work it back to today
Looking at my mentors, and reading many autobiographies they all share a common theme they grew/learned more from the hardest painful experiences while expanding their comfort zone and becoming more confident to face what may come next.
  1. Not everyone’s paying attention
I know most of us spend more time thinking about ourselves than others. I’ve learned that if someone is expressing an opinion about your life, they’ve not often given it much thought. While I don’t challenge them too, I would expect a judgmental person to expand on their opinion. It makes for insightful conversation and you’ll be surprised just how much you can learn about one another.
  1. It’s okay to mind your own business, too
Contrary to the above point, I don’t go around asking people what they think of me. I do not mind constructive criticism though, I feel it cleans up any ill will and I can’t change something that may bother/annoy someone if I am not aware. We are all different, a little step to the left or right to appease someone can make for a happier environment. I’ve had people ask me this very question about themselves and I’ve realized that they don’t need to worry about my opinion. Once they learn to silence their inner critic and practice mindfulness, they usually find the best path for their own life.
  1. I used to be too sensitive!
From interacting with and watching others, I’ve learnt I used to be too sensitive. People would say something even a little negative and it would trigger my own negativity. So, I realized the biggest challenges or negatives were only helping me grow more along my journey.
  1. Overthinking is overrated
I once watched a friend of mind think, rethink, and overthink a job offer. It led him to believe he wasn’t good enough for the job (he was amazing for the position), and he thought that everyone would judge him, even though that wasn’t the case. I learnt from that to identify patterns of overthinking and replace them with positivity.
  1. You don’t have to please everyone
I am familiar with someone that has a friend who bends over backwards to try and please parents. She’s unhappy. Her parents are happy with her just being her. Guess what? It’s impossible to live up to expectations (even if they’re your own), and it’s not worth burning yourself out trying. I’ve learnt to please myself and let everything else fall into place.
  1. Opinions change – go with it
Never, ever let other people’s negative opinions control your way of feeling or thinking. We all have the ability to change our minds in a heartbeat. If you find yourself immersed in an earlier opinion, it may just leave you somewhat lost when your (or someone else’s) mind decides to change.
  1. Distribute what you wish to receive
Ever realized that life’s an echo? That which you send out always comes back. Worry too much about what other people think and that will eventually govern your thoughts and behaviors.

I’ve learnt to be less concerned about all that and focus on sowing what I wish to reap – I happy, fulfilled, and healthy life living the best version of me.

Life Is Too Short

Perhaps most importantly, I learned and now know that life is too short to worry about other people’s thoughts and actions. Just by watching others, I’ve learned to live a life where I decide who I am, what I want, and how I go about it.


“We testify of what we have experienced and witnessed. May our testimony inspired others to share their story.” -Akita


Follow me on a life on insight and fulfillment at marksalinas.com.


Image: Freepik